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Post by roadkill on Jan 21, 2017 14:34:12 GMT
06-11-2016, 06:11 AM
tonight as i slow my mind...i take a deep breath and close my eyes...slowly i exhale and watch as the frames slow i focus on one and it gets clearer until it stops and is in full focus i feel the last of the days sun kiss my face...i cooling breeze washes over me...i button up my light jacket as i stand on the highest peak of the majestic mountain...i hear an eagle as she screams above me...she is so high it takes a minute to find her...she is just a small dark spot in the array of wondrous colors as the sun begins to set...i can feel but not see a presence standing beside me watching the glorious gift of the Creator once more painting His canvas...i smell the sweet perfume of a woman as it tickles my nose...i know i am not alone standing on the mountain...it feels so good to know that i am not alone on this evening enjoying nature at its fullest...the smaller birds and animals are getting the last of their meals before the darkness sets in and they retreat to their nests and bedding areas...i stand in amazement knowing that all this was created for all to enjoy...the only cost is time..which many no longer seem to spend with the One who made it all...my eyes are heavy now and body wanting rest...soon i will be in that other realm of sleep and dreams...my mind is at peace...at least for the moment
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Post by roadkill on Jan 21, 2017 14:34:25 GMT
06-14-2016, 04:59 AM
tonight as i slow my mind and focus on the pik that has stopped...my eyes are closed and i feel the cool night air kiss my face...i smell the sweet lilacs as they dance in the breeze...i open my eyes and i see myself sitting on the shore of a small lake...the surface is like a mirror...reflecting the many stars of the sky above...i see a doe and her fawn come to the waters edge to drink of the glacier clear water...i hear the howl of a lone wolf as he sings from the mountain top...i start a small fire for warmth and lay on my back on the bed roll....the warm glow of the embers float towards the heavens on the smoke..i am reminded of what life was like before all the concrete...i start thinking of all Creator's gifts to His children and how each has a story to be told...as i listen to the stories...my eyes get heavy and my mind rests...at least for the moment
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Post by roadkill on Jan 21, 2017 14:34:38 GMT
06-15-2016, 03:49 AM
tonight as i close my eyes to slow my mind...i take a deep breath and focus on the frames as the zip by as one slows and stops...i smell the sweet aroma of freshly brewed tea as it tickles my nose.. and the familiar scent of maple wood smoke..i open my eyes and see a small fire with a cooking grate over the flames...there is an old man sitting beside the fire and beckons me to come forward..as i reach the warmth of the coals..i watch his face and he hands me a warm cup of tea and a piece of fry bread...as i am enjoying the treats he begins to speak...he says he has be watching me from afar for some time as i walk my path..he talks of my struggles and triumphs that life has given me and how i managed to overcome most of them...i tell him i am not done yet as i feel one day people will see the real me and understand why i am the way i am..how it is not easy for me to trust yet i will still care enough for others that i will not intentionally hurt anyone...he says as long as i continue to try to better myself...that is all anyone can expect...not everyone that smiles at you is a friend..stay aware and you will be ok...with those words spoken he gets to his feet and walks away...my eyes heavy and my body relaxed...my mind slows..at least for the moment
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Post by roadkill on Jan 21, 2017 14:34:52 GMT
06-21-2016, 02:58 AM tonight as i try to slow my mind..i reflect on the weekend that just passed...i woke saturday to a phone call from a cousin...the news he shared was a shock....his sister...my cousin who i was very close to had passed away from a heart attack..she was 1 year older than myself...we had lived pretty much the same life style..hard drugs and booze and had the same friends...i had smoked my first cigarette with her and drank my first beer with her...she was like an older sister who always had my back...she and i were known as the black sheep cousins...we were always together when we were in our teens...until i had to leave town..there are many details that i cant go into here...but we stayed in touch through the years...she was the only one i ever literally trusted with my life...i will miss her so much R.I.P L Til We Meet Again
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Post by roadkill on Jan 21, 2017 14:35:03 GMT
06-22-2016, 05:10 AM
tonight as i slow my mind i will do it a bit different tonight
i will ask Creator to watch over all those that are ill and heal them to comfort all those that are heavy hearted to give relief to all those that are feeling both physical and emotional pain to bring joy to those that are unhappy to ease worry to those who have family members in the hospitals these thing i humbly ask Creator believing all these things will be granted...AMEN
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Post by roadkill on Jan 21, 2017 14:35:20 GMT
06-22-2016, 06:51 PM well L ....today is the day your body is returned to Mother Earth and the ancestors are crying tears of joy as they welcome your spirit home i sure miss you till we meet again O Great Spirit Whose voice I hear in the winds, and Whose breath gives Life to all world, "HEAR ME"!!! Let me walk in beauty, and may my eyes ever behold the red and purple sunset. Make my hands respect the thing you have made and my ears sharp to hear your voice. Let me learn the lessons you have hidden in every Leaf and Rock. I seek strength. Not to be greater than my brother, but to fight my greatest enemy-myself. Make me always ready to come to you with clean hands and straight eyes. So when Life fades, as the fading sunset, my spirit may come to you WITHOUT SHAME
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Post by roadkill on Jan 21, 2017 14:35:48 GMT
06-23-2016, 04:20 AM
tonight as i slow my mind i focus on a frame that shows a pik of years gone by when my cousin ...i will refer to her as L...and i were young..we are at a small pond that we used as a swimming hole and gathered dry wood for a small fire...is many young people there about the same ages as we are...there is an rope hanging from a large willow tree over hanging the pond...we all take turns swing on the rope until we are over the deepest part of the pond and let go...it feels like i am flying for that split second before hitting the cool water...it is a day that makes me happy..a rare emotion for me..as the sun begins to get low in the sky i walk into the woods and get out of my wet shorts and put on my jeans and T-shirt..i then make my way back to the fire where my L is already changed into dry clothes and gestures me to sit beside her...as my butt hits the old log she hands me a cold beer and her smile turns to sadness as she listens to the song being played on the little transistor radio she always carried with her...i remember that song...i can hear it as clear as if i were listening to it right this minute...it has been years since i have heard that song...i understand L what that song meant to you and now whenever i hear it.. i will be reminded of you and the hard life we lived back then..R.I.P L...till we meet again...btw...i seen you in a cloud tonight as i watched the sunset
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Post by roadkill on Jan 21, 2017 14:36:01 GMT
06-24-2016, 04:34 AM
tonight as i slow my mind from the 90 miles an hour it has been going all day i take a deep breath and close my eyes... as i slowly exhale i see the frames slow to where one come into focus i see an old man sitting in a rocking chair on the porch of a rustic cabin...the boards are weather beaten and cracked..there are planks broken on the porch....this only adds character to the wooden structure...i stand watching the old man from a distance as not to disturb him...he seems to be in deep thought as he whittles away on a small piece of poplar with a pocket knife...i continue to observe him and in no time he has turned that small stick into a smoke able pipe..he fills the bowl with tobacco and lights it with a wooden match....he takes a big draw of the smoke and as he exhales he looks skyward with a smile on his face...as i look up to where the old man appears to be looking i see the most beautiful hawk i have ever seen..it circles a few times then flies off...the old man's eyes return to the ground and the pipe falls from his hands...my eyes are now heavy and my mind at rest for the moment
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Post by roadkill on Jan 21, 2017 14:36:22 GMT
06-29-2016, 04:22 AM
tonight as i slow my mind...i am reminded that some days are going to be better than others...i will continue to struggle with my daily activities...that my routine is important for me to follow and the smallest change to it can disrupt my whole thought process..like remembering what day it is and if i did things the right way...thankfully i have the twins to help me to get by...activities may not be perfect but they get done..like feeding them and myself...lol
i begin to focus on the frames as they turn like pages in a book...i see an open field and the sun beginning to find its bed for the night...there are clouds in sight that only add to the beauty of the many shades of yellow red orange violet and deep dark blue...the Creator has once again ran His brush over the vast canvas..as i watch in awe..i see a majestic eagle soar high in the sky..her body is a distinct contrast to the wonder colors i am gazing at..i hear the crickets begin to let me know they are nearby..the smaller birds are fliting about the grass...looking for insects to feed themselves and their young...a squirrel scurries across my feet at it hurries off to store it find of seeds...as i stand there watching all the activity around me i feel a light summer night breeze wash my face...with it is the sweet smell of the forest nearby..what a wonderful world of gifts Creator has given to be enjoyed...my eyes heavy and my soul at peace..i will soon be in the realm known as sleep...my mind rests at least for a moment
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Post by roadkill on Jan 21, 2017 14:36:37 GMT
06-30-2016, 03:57 AM
tonight as i try to slow my mind down...i close my eyes and take a deep breath...the frames slow until i get one to stop..i see myself standing in the middle of a dirt path that is bordered by tall pines and hardwoods...i can smell the sweetness of the maples and the distinct aroma of the pines...it looks like this path has not been traveled in some time as there is grass growing in the path and the low branches of the trees are over hanging the roadway..i barely fit under them as i walk towards the sound of chatter...i round a curve and there is a couple talking to each other and when they see me they get very quite..like i am intruding..so i turn and walk back in the direction i came from...with my back turned they begin their chatter once more..i shrug my shoulders and continue on my way..that is when i hear a voice from above and it speaks so softly..it says have no worry and know that there is always something better in store for you..jut trust in what you know in your heart and follow your instincts..it will all be ok..with that my eyes are heavy and soon i will be in that realm known as sleep..my mind rests at least for a moment
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Post by roadkill on Jan 21, 2017 14:36:49 GMT
08-26-2016, 04:20 AM
tonight i am reflecting on this day..a day which Creator has given..a day of seeing what lies deep within me and i must admit...it scared me...i almost became my father...i dont recall ever feeling so angry...i realized different way to deal with it before it escalated to that point...it truly scared me to know that it hides deep within me..another demon trying to take control...i give Thanks to my Creator for stepping in and making me see exactly what it was and for quenching that fire
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Post by roadkill on Jan 21, 2017 14:37:06 GMT
08-26-2016, 04:20 AM
tonight i am reflecting on this day..a day which Creator has given..a day of seeing what lies deep within me and i must admit...it scared me...i almost became my father...i dont recall ever feeling so angry...i realized different way to deal with it before it escalated to that point...it truly scared me to know that it hides deep within me..another demon trying to take control...i give Thanks to my Creator for stepping in and making me see exactly what it was and for quenching that fire
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Post by roadkill on Jan 21, 2017 14:37:26 GMT
08-26-2016, 04:20 AM tonight i am reflecting on this day..a day which Creator has given..a day of seeing what lies deep within me and i must admit...it scared me...i almost became my father...i dont recall ever feeling so angry...i realized different way to deal with it before it escalated to that point...it truly scared me to know that it hides deep within me..another demon trying to take control...i give Thanks to my Creator for stepping in and making me see exactly what it was and for quenching that fire
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Post by roadkill on Jan 21, 2017 14:37:41 GMT
09-02-2016, 01:46 AM today is not a good day right now...i have so many thoughts and words all scrambled up inside my head and tears flowing from my eyes...i have lost another friend as so many here have today..i come humbly to you Great Spirit and ask that our friend and brother has a safe journey to be with you for everlasting and comfort those of us left here to grieve the passing of a true warrior...let us remember the joy and laughter he brought us all and how he cared for each and everyone he knew..i for one experienced his huge caring heart first hand i thank you for putting him on my path even though it was only for a short time..he had a huge impact on me he will remain forever in our thoughts and hearts
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Post by roadkill on Jan 21, 2017 14:38:03 GMT
12-13-2016, 07:02 AM
another day is drawing to a close...i am so blessed by Creator...with all that has taken place this year...i find myself still walking up to gorgeous sunrises and seeing His brush strokes across the evening skies...i have a warm dry place to lay my head and food to nourish my body...He has blessed me with the ability to connect to all you here...Creator has given me a special gift to see what is unseen by many...i have learned to use that gift..to help know the difference between light and dark..right and wrong..good or bad..what HE shows me that is the true gift...i cant help but think of a man that i have never met..never spoke to..i know only his handle...this past week he has shown who he truly is inside..a man that if i ever met him face to face i would call brother...he has given so much of himself for many years behind the scenes without ever asking for anything in return..until this week..i felt it only right that support was shown to him and helping hands were made aware to him...he came through for not only me but for many...his generosity and compassion brought me to tears...this man is surely one of Creator's miracles and warriors...his name as i know him by is Jokeroo and tonight's color is dedicated to him with a sincere deep heart felt thank you ((miigwiitch))
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